So this Sunday I decided that I wanted to dust off my culinary skills (insert smirks/laughing out loud here) and cook dinner. Ended up being a philipino chicken on rice thing that I can't spell (Wes thanks btw) and wontons. So good!!! So I was calling my friends on Saturday and I didn't have Jim's or Jeff's phone numbers (they are brothers). But I figured I'd see them at church and invite them when I saw them. They weren't at church, so they didn't get to come.
I saw them later Sunday night, and while I was talking to Jim I mentioned that I didn't have his number.
"You're kidding! These girls (referring to Teresa and Sue) haven't given you that?"
So he rattles off a number and says, "that one is Jeff's... this is mine... do you want me to have your number?"
Of course! So Jim has my number but Jeff does not, and I have Jeff's number. This presents a unique opportunity to mess with someone. I am not one to pass that up, ever.
So later, later that night, I start texting Jeff
"Jeff, you looked so hot tonight!"
"I really liked your haircut."
No response, and I'm not sure how far I can go and still be friends...
"you know, Jim told me you liked to text, but I guess not!"
Still no response. Then I remembered a conversation Jeff and I had some weeks back: "you
know, blonde girls don't like redheads. The reason why is because they have fair skin, and redheads have fair skin, so blonds stay away. Brunettes on the other hand generally have darker skin, so the fact that redheads have fair skin isn't a problem for them." If you haven't figured it out, Jeff is a redhead. Stroke of genius...
"Do you know why brunettes prefer redheads?"
"who is this?"
Don't worry, we're still friends!
Probably the funnest two hours spent texting ever.... just like being a grandma's favorite, you have to narrow the category down just enough :)
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Monday, November 12, 2007
To quote a bright lady "Ah... Life..."
My brother Wes, is a resident in Spokane - not at Sacred Heart he's at the other hospital - Deaconess... he doesn't have a lot of time to call me to communicate and what not, so he relies on my blog to stay up to date on the happenings in my life. Of course, this requires my blog to be up to date. So even though nothing really exciting has happened, here is my blog to keep my brother from having to call.
The biggest thing that is going on right now is Jessica is getting married. I will be doing her hair for her bridal pictures on Saturday. I am still working out the kinks for what she wants, but it's easier to do other people's hair than your own, since you can see what you are doing.
After I get her hair done I am going to play some football. It could be my favorite game ever!! I never really understood why there wasn't a female equivelant, but it will be lots of fun... I'm way excited.
I have been making headway with my migraines. They are still pretty frequent, but between the drugs, the braces, and getting my neck cracked every other day I am making some progress. Hopefully by the time Christmas/wedding rolls around I will be mostly better. On the issue of my neck, it's pretty cool/distrubing. Necks are supposed to curve, mine has lost the curve, is starting to curve back the wrong way. The chiropractor says it takes about 10 years for a neck to get itself that messed up. So I am blaming the trampoline... I can't think of what else I could have done.
Braces are a cruel means of torture still. And now I have little rubber bands to keep my mouth about 85% immobilized, it could be the best diet I have ever been on. Every time I want to eat something, I ask the question "is it really worth trying to get these things back on my teeth?" and the answer is invariably no.
let's see, what else? Oh, back to Jessica getting married. Ashley and I kind of have set a precident that we make a quilt and tie it for the bridal shower we get put in charge of. Well, for Ashley's friend shower (years ago) Jessica and I did one of those "make a plate" things you did way back in elemenetary school where you draw on a round piece of paper and you send it away and magically it comes back on a plate. And then we did a quilt for her family shower. anyway my mom loves the plates. So instead of a quilt for Jecca's family shower, we are making plates. Jecca still wants a quilt (anyone surprised on that?), so Ashley and I are still making a quilt and Kaylene is going to use her awesome quilting machine. So it isn't really any extra work, except that it is in addition to everything else. The funny (though ultimately not surprising) thing is my mom, in spite of all her railroading, still wants Ash and I to plan the family shower -- even though she has now chosen the activity, tried to change the date, has nixed any lunch ideas that have been thrown out, and has informed everyone she talks to that the boys can come and there won't be any "silly shower games." It's one of those things where I just don't care that much. I am willing to plan a party for my sister 'cause in spite of everything I love the girl. And Ashley and I are talking about it and trying to work it out so Jessica will get the things she needs/wants and coordinate with other "themes" of showers. Incidentally, the shower we are planning will have some "silly shower games" and we don't want to make the lunch a big deal. But mom if you want to plan the shower, just plan the damn shower!!!
And for the record I am working on another stupid boy story. It hasn't reached its ironic conclusion yet, and therefore cannot be packaged up in a nice little blog... but it's comin'
The biggest thing that is going on right now is Jessica is getting married. I will be doing her hair for her bridal pictures on Saturday. I am still working out the kinks for what she wants, but it's easier to do other people's hair than your own, since you can see what you are doing.
After I get her hair done I am going to play some football. It could be my favorite game ever!! I never really understood why there wasn't a female equivelant, but it will be lots of fun... I'm way excited.
I have been making headway with my migraines. They are still pretty frequent, but between the drugs, the braces, and getting my neck cracked every other day I am making some progress. Hopefully by the time Christmas/wedding rolls around I will be mostly better. On the issue of my neck, it's pretty cool/distrubing. Necks are supposed to curve, mine has lost the curve, is starting to curve back the wrong way. The chiropractor says it takes about 10 years for a neck to get itself that messed up. So I am blaming the trampoline... I can't think of what else I could have done.
Braces are a cruel means of torture still. And now I have little rubber bands to keep my mouth about 85% immobilized, it could be the best diet I have ever been on. Every time I want to eat something, I ask the question "is it really worth trying to get these things back on my teeth?" and the answer is invariably no.
let's see, what else? Oh, back to Jessica getting married. Ashley and I kind of have set a precident that we make a quilt and tie it for the bridal shower we get put in charge of. Well, for Ashley's friend shower (years ago) Jessica and I did one of those "make a plate" things you did way back in elemenetary school where you draw on a round piece of paper and you send it away and magically it comes back on a plate. And then we did a quilt for her family shower. anyway my mom loves the plates. So instead of a quilt for Jecca's family shower, we are making plates. Jecca still wants a quilt (anyone surprised on that?), so Ashley and I are still making a quilt and Kaylene is going to use her awesome quilting machine. So it isn't really any extra work, except that it is in addition to everything else. The funny (though ultimately not surprising) thing is my mom, in spite of all her railroading, still wants Ash and I to plan the family shower -- even though she has now chosen the activity, tried to change the date, has nixed any lunch ideas that have been thrown out, and has informed everyone she talks to that the boys can come and there won't be any "silly shower games." It's one of those things where I just don't care that much. I am willing to plan a party for my sister 'cause in spite of everything I love the girl. And Ashley and I are talking about it and trying to work it out so Jessica will get the things she needs/wants and coordinate with other "themes" of showers. Incidentally, the shower we are planning will have some "silly shower games" and we don't want to make the lunch a big deal. But mom if you want to plan the shower, just plan the damn shower!!!
And for the record I am working on another stupid boy story. It hasn't reached its ironic conclusion yet, and therefore cannot be packaged up in a nice little blog... but it's comin'
Saturday, October 20, 2007
Jack Rabbit
So back when I was younger I came up with a theory on how one prepares to be a parent. You see, one can't just jump into being responsible for another person that is just asking for trouble.
Instead, if you are going to be a good parent you have to start by being responsible for something that requires less attention and gradually work your way up to baby.
This is my 6 step program to success:
1. House Plant: Water it, make sure it gets some sun, love it - must live for 6 months
2. Fish in a Bowl: Betas and Goldfish are prime candidates here, if you don't feed them they don't remember - must live for 6 months
3. Fish in an Aquarium: Slightly more high maintenance since you have to replace filters and stuff - must live for a year - I would suggest multiple fish and average the live.
4. Rodents or Reptiles: Hamsters, Mice, Rats, etc. Basically something you can hold but won't get traumatized too easily by neglect or other mishaps - must live for a year, lizards and rabbits should live longer than that but it isn't necessary
5. Cat or Dog: I don't judge, but it should be one of these Dogs are preferred since they require a bit more attention that cats. There is no time frame here, since both dogs and cats can live for a very long time, they shouldn't be kicking the bucket anytime soon but you can get rid of them in moving...
6. Now you're ready for the kid, you've cleaned up messes, loved, nurtured, and been a great preson to some lesser animals - now you can be in charge of a human.
Since I firmly believe in this process I bought a rabbit. I don't think that I am able to count this animal on my steps though since it resides with my parents. Not my fault I don't have a house to keep Jack in. But he is so cute, like an autistic dog. Oh, and house trained, he doesn't do any tricks yet but rabbits are always fun!
Instead, if you are going to be a good parent you have to start by being responsible for something that requires less attention and gradually work your way up to baby.
This is my 6 step program to success:
1. House Plant: Water it, make sure it gets some sun, love it - must live for 6 months
2. Fish in a Bowl: Betas and Goldfish are prime candidates here, if you don't feed them they don't remember - must live for 6 months
3. Fish in an Aquarium: Slightly more high maintenance since you have to replace filters and stuff - must live for a year - I would suggest multiple fish and average the live.
4. Rodents or Reptiles: Hamsters, Mice, Rats, etc. Basically something you can hold but won't get traumatized too easily by neglect or other mishaps - must live for a year, lizards and rabbits should live longer than that but it isn't necessary
5. Cat or Dog: I don't judge, but it should be one of these Dogs are preferred since they require a bit more attention that cats. There is no time frame here, since both dogs and cats can live for a very long time, they shouldn't be kicking the bucket anytime soon but you can get rid of them in moving...
6. Now you're ready for the kid, you've cleaned up messes, loved, nurtured, and been a great preson to some lesser animals - now you can be in charge of a human.
Since I firmly believe in this process I bought a rabbit. I don't think that I am able to count this animal on my steps though since it resides with my parents. Not my fault I don't have a house to keep Jack in. But he is so cute, like an autistic dog. Oh, and house trained, he doesn't do any tricks yet but rabbits are always fun!
Moving On...
My current roommates are all related, so when Suzanne decided that she didn't want to live in the ghetto anymore and wanted to move to an ultimately smaller townhome it makes sense that the one who would not be moving with them would be me. Their new house was supposed to be done in November, I think it has been pushed back, but I don't know. So I set the deadline for me finding a new place for the end of October.
I am not one to set goals and not meet them, so yesterday I solidified my new living arrangement. I'm not moving very far, about 10 minutes north to N.SLC. It's a nicer neighborhood and a nicer house, I don't know the girls I am moving in with very well, but they don't appear to be psycho so I should be fine.
As a single girl, moving is just something you have to do at least once a year.
I am not one to set goals and not meet them, so yesterday I solidified my new living arrangement. I'm not moving very far, about 10 minutes north to N.SLC. It's a nicer neighborhood and a nicer house, I don't know the girls I am moving in with very well, but they don't appear to be psycho so I should be fine.
As a single girl, moving is just something you have to do at least once a year.
The Kids Team
I just want to announce that the kids team is going to be losing a key player in the next couple of months. This will be especially important due to the fact that the person being lost is none other than my baby sister Jecca. You know the one: she is the cute little girl who cut her bangs, put the resot of her hair in ringlets, and wore one earring for her school pictures. It little girl that my grandma couldn't believe that such a small girl had such a loud voice. Anyway as we all know one can't get married and stay on the kids team, it has been attempted but all have failed. She's getting married on Dec. 27.
This means a couple of things:
1. Once again I am the older, unmarried sister at the wedding.
2. I get to use all of the answers I came up with for Ashley's wedding to that inevitable question "So why aren't you married?" again. Go ahead ask me, but I am not going to sugar coat the response and you may be shocked and/or appalled. Most of these were not my creation but Lisa's.
3. Cody may or may not be the favorite next year.
4. Tom will have another guy to threaten.
5. Wes, Ty and their families will be in town for Christmas this year.
6. The only thing worse than getting the questions about why I'm not married is the silent, pitying looks shot from those elderly relatives of mine who have given up on me ever getting married.
7. I will have to go on a kick ass vacation come January, I am leaning towards the Bahamas, but that could change at any time.... up until I make purchases, then it's pretty set.
So let's set the record straight. I am very happy for her. While I am once again shocked to find that my nieces and nephews will think I am the youngest sister, Bret's a good guy and exceeds my expectations (I never thought that I would like whomever Jecca married), and he treats my sister well. So it's just Tom and me now, we will have to work double time to undermine the parents :)
The other thing that I would like to put to rest is that I am not bitter. I understand that this is a rumor that has been circulating among people who think they know. As my aunt says, there are worse things than being single.
The kids team will prevail!!!!
This means a couple of things:
1. Once again I am the older, unmarried sister at the wedding.
2. I get to use all of the answers I came up with for Ashley's wedding to that inevitable question "So why aren't you married?" again. Go ahead ask me, but I am not going to sugar coat the response and you may be shocked and/or appalled. Most of these were not my creation but Lisa's.
3. Cody may or may not be the favorite next year.
4. Tom will have another guy to threaten.
5. Wes, Ty and their families will be in town for Christmas this year.
6. The only thing worse than getting the questions about why I'm not married is the silent, pitying looks shot from those elderly relatives of mine who have given up on me ever getting married.
7. I will have to go on a kick ass vacation come January, I am leaning towards the Bahamas, but that could change at any time.... up until I make purchases, then it's pretty set.
So let's set the record straight. I am very happy for her. While I am once again shocked to find that my nieces and nephews will think I am the youngest sister, Bret's a good guy and exceeds my expectations (I never thought that I would like whomever Jecca married), and he treats my sister well. So it's just Tom and me now, we will have to work double time to undermine the parents :)
The other thing that I would like to put to rest is that I am not bitter. I understand that this is a rumor that has been circulating among people who think they know. As my aunt says, there are worse things than being single.
The kids team will prevail!!!!
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Braces suck
So I am at my parents house and I'm not feeling too hot so I was laying on the couch with a fleece blanket. And I always have any blanket pulled up over my head. I don't know why it's just my thing. Anyway, so I was talking to Jecca and turned around and made an incredibly smart remark. It doesn't matter what I said because the brilliance was overshadowed by the fact that my braces had caught on the fleece and the blanket was affixed to my face. Fortunately Jecca was nice enough to not hold the smart ass comment against me and helped a sister out.
Saturday, September 22, 2007
And People Wonder Why I Am Still Single aka Tale of the Stupid Boy Parts 1, 2... and 3
Ok, I know Beckee has already heard this story and probably told Wes. And since they are the only people who actually look at my blog, this is probably unnecessary. But as this is to be a portrait of the single life, I cannot in good conscience exclude the stupid boy story.
Part I
So a couple of weeks ago I was driving home from work with my friend Jason. Jason and I go way back... like 3 months, so we're pretty close, we hang out a couple times a week, go to lunch, text/talk quite often. Oh, and he is from Australia so get out your best accent, it makes the story that much more entertaining.
Jason asks me, "so what are you doing tonight?" This start of a conversation usually means that we are going to hang out later that day.
However, "umm... I have a date."
So Jason starts telling about this girl he is sort of dating, they hang out a couple times a week, she takes him home from work occasionally, and he feels like things are getting serious but he doesn't want things to be serious. I'm a little confused, trying to decide if this is one of those things were the guy is telling a story about some other girl when really the girl is me. I'm sure we've all been there.
Anyway, I didn't want to get caught in that situation, so I go into damage control. "Why do you think you are dating this girl?"
"Well, we hang out a lot and talk a lot.... blah blah blah." It still sounds like me.
Then the stroke of genius comes, "well, have you kissed her?"
"Yes... But, I don't usually kiss girls so soon, it just sort of happened... blah blah blah." (Jason talks a lot.)
So I know it's not me, which is good because I didn't want to tell Jason that it takes a bit more that taking the man home and hanging out to consider a "serious dating pattern" to be established.
But he has delved into the topic of kissing, which I try to stay silent on... in pretty much any situation with any guy because only one of two things can happen when you tell a guy, "well, I grew up in a house where the rule was: If a girl looks like she needs to be kissed you had better do it" (Thanks Dad/Grandpa!) and cousin whose motto was "it's easy to kiss a girl on the first date, the trick is getting her to kiss you on the first date." (Thanks Mick!).
So I am staying silent, smirking, but silent. I was silent a fraction too long and Jason looks at me, sees the smirk and says "what?"
Enter the kissing conversation. I don't think that kissing is really a big deal one way or the other. It's not like a dog marking it's territory... blah blah blah...insert philosophies explained above (now I am talking too much.) Jason, a little taken back, says "I don't think I have ever heard a girl say anything like that."
And the inevitable, "So, are you going to kiss him?"
"Who?"
"The guy you are going out with tonight?"
"I don't know, maybe."
"Well you are going to tell me if you do."
"No. I don't kiss and tell."
By this time, I am at Jason's house he looks like he's been hit by a bus. Tells me to have a good time and to" let me know how it went."
I go on the date, don't kiss the guy and send Jason the text. "I didn't get kissed tonight."
To this I recieve a lightening fast response, "that's my girl."
.... don't worry there was no response ....
Part II
This Sunday I was over at my friend Jesse's house playing games. Jason among others were there. Jason had come over with Jeff and Jim (don't you love all the J names in this story?). So were playing games, my room mates and I were getting ready to go (I drove separately since I was coming from my parents house.) Jim and Jeff were not ready to go yet and Jason wanted to leave so once again we find ourselves in the familiar setting of Stefanie and Jason driving to Jason's house in Stefanie's car.
We say good-bye to my room mates and get in my car. Now Jason and I haven't been alone since the previous story, still talking/texting a lot, and the hang outs happen to be in a group setting.
So what is the first thing he says when he gets in my car?
"So, have you snogged him?"
"Who?"
"That guy you went out with a couple weeks ago. What was his name?"
"Scott, no I haven't kissed him."
"Do I know Scott?"
"No, you don't."
"Well, I'm not dating Sara any more. I found out she is only 20, that's a bit to young."
"Sara, is that the girl you've been snogging?"
"yeh."
"20, huh?" I am not sure how old Jason is, I assume he is pulling 30/31. I think this should add to the ridiculousness of the situation that I have been relating to you.
"Yeh, and I have just wasted a lot of years w/ girls that just aren't ready to be serious."
Enter dating conversation. Now, I don't now about all ya'll (Wes and Beckee) but I don't have a dating conversation with just any one. But that is what Jason is wanting to talk about, so great, let's talk about dating. Let's talk about the fact that I've only ever really thought that maybe I could be with a guy forever twice. And both of those ended with my heart broken and me not dating/looking to date for months. Jason had similar situations, only more of them.
At the end of the conversation, we are planning on going out Wednesday, during the day.
Part III
Jason stands me up. Finally, I send the text "I thought we were hanging out today." I get a text later that evening that he is at night class and won't be able to see me today, sorry.
And thus we have the tale of the stupid boy.
Part I
So a couple of weeks ago I was driving home from work with my friend Jason. Jason and I go way back... like 3 months, so we're pretty close, we hang out a couple times a week, go to lunch, text/talk quite often. Oh, and he is from Australia so get out your best accent, it makes the story that much more entertaining.
Jason asks me, "so what are you doing tonight?" This start of a conversation usually means that we are going to hang out later that day.
However, "umm... I have a date."
So Jason starts telling about this girl he is sort of dating, they hang out a couple times a week, she takes him home from work occasionally, and he feels like things are getting serious but he doesn't want things to be serious. I'm a little confused, trying to decide if this is one of those things were the guy is telling a story about some other girl when really the girl is me. I'm sure we've all been there.
Anyway, I didn't want to get caught in that situation, so I go into damage control. "Why do you think you are dating this girl?"
"Well, we hang out a lot and talk a lot.... blah blah blah." It still sounds like me.
Then the stroke of genius comes, "well, have you kissed her?"
"Yes... But, I don't usually kiss girls so soon, it just sort of happened... blah blah blah." (Jason talks a lot.)
So I know it's not me, which is good because I didn't want to tell Jason that it takes a bit more that taking the man home and hanging out to consider a "serious dating pattern" to be established.
But he has delved into the topic of kissing, which I try to stay silent on... in pretty much any situation with any guy because only one of two things can happen when you tell a guy, "well, I grew up in a house where the rule was: If a girl looks like she needs to be kissed you had better do it" (Thanks Dad/Grandpa!) and cousin whose motto was "it's easy to kiss a girl on the first date, the trick is getting her to kiss you on the first date." (Thanks Mick!).
So I am staying silent, smirking, but silent. I was silent a fraction too long and Jason looks at me, sees the smirk and says "what?"
Enter the kissing conversation. I don't think that kissing is really a big deal one way or the other. It's not like a dog marking it's territory... blah blah blah...insert philosophies explained above (now I am talking too much.) Jason, a little taken back, says "I don't think I have ever heard a girl say anything like that."
And the inevitable, "So, are you going to kiss him?"
"Who?"
"The guy you are going out with tonight?"
"I don't know, maybe."
"Well you are going to tell me if you do."
"No. I don't kiss and tell."
By this time, I am at Jason's house he looks like he's been hit by a bus. Tells me to have a good time and to" let me know how it went."
I go on the date, don't kiss the guy and send Jason the text. "I didn't get kissed tonight."
To this I recieve a lightening fast response, "that's my girl."
.... don't worry there was no response ....
Part II
This Sunday I was over at my friend Jesse's house playing games. Jason among others were there. Jason had come over with Jeff and Jim (don't you love all the J names in this story?). So were playing games, my room mates and I were getting ready to go (I drove separately since I was coming from my parents house.) Jim and Jeff were not ready to go yet and Jason wanted to leave so once again we find ourselves in the familiar setting of Stefanie and Jason driving to Jason's house in Stefanie's car.
We say good-bye to my room mates and get in my car. Now Jason and I haven't been alone since the previous story, still talking/texting a lot, and the hang outs happen to be in a group setting.
So what is the first thing he says when he gets in my car?
"So, have you snogged him?"
"Who?"
"That guy you went out with a couple weeks ago. What was his name?"
"Scott, no I haven't kissed him."
"Do I know Scott?"
"No, you don't."
"Well, I'm not dating Sara any more. I found out she is only 20, that's a bit to young."
"Sara, is that the girl you've been snogging?"
"yeh."
"20, huh?" I am not sure how old Jason is, I assume he is pulling 30/31. I think this should add to the ridiculousness of the situation that I have been relating to you.
"Yeh, and I have just wasted a lot of years w/ girls that just aren't ready to be serious."
Enter dating conversation. Now, I don't now about all ya'll (Wes and Beckee) but I don't have a dating conversation with just any one. But that is what Jason is wanting to talk about, so great, let's talk about dating. Let's talk about the fact that I've only ever really thought that maybe I could be with a guy forever twice. And both of those ended with my heart broken and me not dating/looking to date for months. Jason had similar situations, only more of them.
At the end of the conversation, we are planning on going out Wednesday, during the day.
Part III
Jason stands me up. Finally, I send the text "I thought we were hanging out today." I get a text later that evening that he is at night class and won't be able to see me today, sorry.
And thus we have the tale of the stupid boy.
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